Jurassic World: Rebirth

Slop

I’m going to laugh when this stomps the shit out of Superman and Fantastic Four.

shit stomps out shit

Exciting! What a time to be alive!

it looks retarded but I still want to see it.

Mutant dinos aside, it does look better than Dominion. Probably because Edwards is a better director. I have issues with stuff like Godzilla and Rogue One but visually they all look good and Edwards gets scale and weight right.

it looks better than Dominion because this one's got dinosaurs in it

yeah they shot it on 35mm but had some pajeet do an awful color grading yet again, what a waste of film

This is all kinda depressing. or maybe it's just my life. oh well.

So it's literally just gonna be a Jurassic Franchise hodge podge movie?

River raft T.rex chase

Pulled directly from the JP novel

Traveling to dinosaur island to steal dinosaur eggs

Pulled directly from the plot of The Lost World novel

More monstrous-styled mutant dinosaur

Pulled from the shelved Jurassic Park 4 concepts

Mayan Ruins

Pulled directly from Trespasser

Even the focus on the pterosaur and spino set pieces feels a bit like they're just trying to pull fan-favorite concepts from Jurassic Park 3.

Honestly, it feels like they've just said "fuck you" to Dominion and have gone back to the soft-remake approach of the first two Jurassic World films. Jurassic World was a soft remake of the Jurassic Park concept, Fallen Kingdom was a soft remake of The Lost World concept (the first half, anyway), and now this looks like it's trying for a soft remake of Jurassic Park 3's "mercs go to dinosaur island, get fucked up by a previously-undisclosed dinosaur, and need to escape" premise.

DINO KINO IS BACK

It’s the plot of Aliens, scum bag betrays everyone to steal the alien dna *AHEM* mutant dinosaur dna, with Jurassic park 3, family wants to escape island

This looks so fucking bad man. I’ll stick to nerdy documentaries.

theme of the movie is don’t make profits from shitty mutants banking on the nostalgia of the original park

BETTER MAKE A MOVIE ABOUT MAKING PROFITS FROM SHITTY MUTANTS BAKING ON NOSTALGIA

nah they’re genuinely just fucking retards. Honestly.

That’s what JP3 was.

the “nerdy” documentaries are twice as pozzed as this will be sadly, stick to Walking With Dinosaurs and When Dinosaurs Roamed America. Dinotasia was cool too.

i have zero excitement over this movie.

and how do the mayan ruins tie up with all this? no way it's just a decor

I’ll take honestly anything with dinosaurs over this dumb shit. I’d rather just spend money on a museum or something.

Idk why but Jurassic park getting ruined makes me so miserable. I think the original just had so much wonder or something when I was a kid.

I think it looks like a fun movie. Seems like they're making the dinosaurs scary and menacing again instead of treating them like Pokemon. I'm really looking forward to it.

mutted cast with generic CGI dinosaurs in full illumination doing the same old setpieces from 30 years ago. instantly forgettable.

dragons

rancors

WTF is this shit?

Old ruins that they gave no shits about because the company came to the island to do experiments.

Anything looks better than these Jurassic World movies since they had no actual director.

mutant dinosaurs/failed clones who were dumped on the island because Hammond was too pussy to kill anything.

1 > 4 > 2 > 3 > 6 > 7 > 5

Supposedly this movie starts with a flashback in that alien Romulus scene where the guy is trapped with the alien gorilla. What are the odds there’s going to be a reference of the old cast or something about the first island

jewish diarrhea

laziest idea imaginable won’t be watching
also, “failed clones” that doesn’t even make any sense, why would “failed clones” live to be full sized, articulated adults instead of asymmetrical abominations like alien resurrection that don’t even survive through the embryo stage? We have perfectly adapted flying chimera griffins and rancor rexes? doesn’t even make sense in its own context, if these animals are functional and alive they’re not “failed clones” they’re just lazy, shitty designs from uncreative, prejudiced, and lazy minds

my fren :3

The cast is making me not want to see this. The dialogue was literally

Uh, that just happened.

tier

Holy fucking shit this is going to wipe the fucking floor with Superjew and the Fanstic 4ussies no one even likes to begin with.

Good ranking, I would swap 2 with 4

1 > TLW > World > /// > Fallen Kingdom > Dominion

Even though they're making it look like the dinosaurs are more vicious and scary in this one its still going to suck if they still have the retarded "no unearned deaths" rule.

why are they even taking that dino with them?

hmm this island is full of dangerous predators...maybe it'd be a good idea to bring this noisy prey that won't stop crying and attracting dinosaurs!

dont care, they did the premise for JW1 and JW2, it's done, move on!

because it's cute

what is 7

Fan theory always was that the JP3 Spino was a fucked up mutant

That's probably going to become canon with this movie

cool

Fallen Kingdom is the best World movie

using AI on the posters

small indie studio please understand

The movie looks interesting, but all I care about is JW Evolution 3. Still no news about it.

They could do so much more with this IP but every movie is just a return to the island or hyping up a new lab created Dinosaur they have to stop. I hate Hollywood nepotism

If they're so desperate for new "monsters" why not just use other megafauna from other eras. There were a lot of cool animals throughout history that weren't dinosaurs.

Do you really think that every attempt at cloning came out perfect every single time? Do you really think Hammond would have the abominations ordered to be killed when in the movie he flipped his shit because Grant was shooting at raptors that were trying to kill his grandchildren?

the mutants make sense whether you like it or not.

The problem is the trailer shows they were trying to make mutants, they weren't mistakes

They even named the winged raptors mutadons and we can see a failed mutadon, so the ones we see in the wild were intended to be mutated dinosaurs

btw they replaced the two-headed raptor failed clone with a two-headed mutadon

well that is retarded then and its just the hybrid shit all over again

I hope this movie bombs. It feels unnecessary. We just finished a terrible trilogy and they go right into a new one and think they can sell it with a washed up old Scarlett Johannsen. This movie gives me serious money laundering vibes.

looks like shit

According to the leaked script, it's because 2 of the biggest shareholders named Drago Draconius and Allen Xenomorphos wanted to make dinosaurs that resembled dragons and aliens

210749039

because marketing nigger.MARKETING, they want a baby yoda. They want to sell toys. This shit have zero soul.

Hope scarlet gets BLACKED by the soldiers

i'm going to watch the stupid dinosaur action movie, I'm going to have fun, and there's nothing you miserable bitches can do to stop me

hope a t-rex kills your stupid spinos

It's pathetic how much our opinions upset you

whats the best "rip off" jurassic park movie? i was on a movie website and there are like 50 of them. there has to be 1 that is something. statistically speaking.

im amazed the second and third one of the new trilogy made over a billion dollars. the first one was really fun but the next two were fucking awful and still made shit ton of cash

Not really. Pretty much all dinosaur movies outside of the JP franchise are complete shit, that's why JP keeps chugging along even though a lot of the movies are subpar.

I would love to know who thought it was a good idea to fill a summer action movie with scenes of dinosaurs being burned alive.

Or who thought it was a good idea to make a dinosaur movie about locust.

What is the point, what are the stakes in a PG-13 movie? Zero blood, nobody dies. Scarlett still makes my peepee hard tho, I'd give you that.

This.

People love dinos

you’re a retard

we found it?

no. it found us

The last trilogy was cancer running on nostalgia berries

1st had call backs the the OG movie

2nd teased Jeff Goldblum and if you watched this movie more old cast will return Goyim

3rd brought back the old cast and was god awful

that"s one of these frogposts about cliché lines. i don't see how it can even make sense talking about a mosasaur

only beats prehistoric t-rex because it slips in mud

doesn't kill a single person even though there's like 30 of them running around her feet

gets killed by a blind herbivore

more like the bitchasaurus

Does anybody think these movies aren't violent enough?

None of the World movies had anything like Arnold's dismembered. bloody arm.

It’s the Dee Dee Rex

This is literally straight out from Alien Resurrection, same color palette too. JFC it should be a crime to watch this garbage.

What if the third biggest shareholder was called Charles Dickens?

The next Jurassic World movie should be a Fast and Furious and Terminator crossover.

In a future where rogue AI has unleashed both cloned dinosaurs and Terminators to wipe out humanity, Dom Toretto's crew joins forces with Owen Grady and a reprogrammed T-800. Together, they must race against time using advanced tech and muscle cars to stop the apocalypse before it begins.

The next one has the Aliens vs Predator war come to Earth, and Dom must pull his family together with the help of advanced Dino based AI quantum tech and defeat the alien threat.

So, Cadillacs and Dinosaurs? I dig it.

They wanted the baby yoda money