So this guys power is that he's a virgin, he can't have sex, can't even master bate, he is made out of rocks so he can't be killed UT that's all ????
Red/blue pill me on The Thing
can't have sex
Grimm.
He has a sloppy face and an AI body but his movie will still bring in a billion
No I'm pretty sure he can have sex. His dick is smooth like marble. He dated Alicia Masters for years. Didn't they even get married? I don't remember but I'm pretty sure. Or they were going to.
he turns into a human once a year or some shit so he can fuck.
His whole character is that being the thing sucks complete ass but there's not much he can do about it and might as well be a hero
Zappa reference. It’s a 60s thaaang. You might not get it.
HELP I’M A ROCK
He’s not rock, it’s like a horrific version of harlequin ichthyosis where his skin becomes an extremely hard carapace and all his organs change too
I think his character is supposed to be a practicing Jew so the fact that he is a virgin is sort of a non-factor and he ends up with a blind black woman.
He has no rock dick but he has jizz filled rock balls, so he can't blow his load and has to clobber villains out of sexual frustration.
He was given the chance to change back a couple times but refused because Alicia was in love with The Thing and he didn't wanna lose her. So I'm pretty sure that means he could fuck her as The Thing. As a matter of fact when I say it out loud like that, I think it was actually implied he had a much better dick as The Thing
I'd have a hard time believing Ben Grimm didn't have a few serious girlfriends before becoming the Thing. But as Says, being the Thing sucks and that's what makes him a hero. Everyone's scared of him, nobody can stand to look at him, his best friend ruined his life, but dammit he can still help. So that's what he does. Tirelessly, with no hope of relief or reward. Because he might look like a monster, but underneath it all he's a god damn MAN.
Who gives a fuck if he can have sex, he's a giant rock monster, that's way cooler than having generic sex, someone thing on this planet almost everyone does
When the last time you had sex? Time, location, and name of partner. Go ahead.
He can be killed. He's not invulnerable but that's a good question. I don't remember what his reaction to bullets is for example. But yeah he's probably bullet proof to low caliber for starters. Definitely invulnerable to blades and stuff.
A pickaxe in his head can absolutely kill him and he absolutely can have sex. Pic rel.
Remember he had to wear a mask after Wolverine slashed his face up?
Should've aimed for the brain
Well right but that's adamantium. The most important thing to remember is its not rock. It's rock like.
this has got me bricked up
maybe the worst version of the thing yet, and thats saying something.
You mean just the costume? I don't know if he wears it the whole movie but thats similar as I recall to his rocketship suit in the comic. As for what I heard of the voice it was not good. His face is great though. Probably the best yet.
How does he wipe?
armor piercing bazooka rounds
This is the kind of thing that I hate about comic book logic.
Logan has sharp unbreakable claws, but does he have the superstrength to match an armour piercing bazooka? The answer is no. Not even close. But our five year old kids are supposed to take this shit seriously?
What's that? They're not? Then what the fuck are we even talking about?!?
newsflash, capeshit is stupid trash meant for adolescents and children
Not who you're replying to but,
Its overly live action disney cartoon. He's talking about the fact that the animation belongs in the new snow white movie.
newsflash
I've never liked The Thing because The Incredible Hulk exists. He's like a cheap ass weaker version of Hulk, but he's made out of rock. Yet Hulk is 100× more indestructible. Hell, even Colossus could beat Thing and he's a fuckin jobber.
The comic books were printed by the same publication but didnt have access to eachothers characters. They wanted the hulk, they even have the exact same origin story. The thing is literally just knockoff hulk.
Is that true? How did Marvel not have access to their original characters?
His dick is smooth like marble.
You sure about that?
he can clobber morons like OP
It's kinda true
The hulk is actually a knock of thing that was more of a jeckyll and hyde horror story. But the executives at the time wanted their stories separate.
ribbed for her pleasure
And during that time he was in another romantic relationship. Ms.Marvel got turned into a female Thing. Apparently it's implied that not only can The Thing have sex but he has much better sex.
It's true but not in that example. The Hulk was in Fantastix Four #12 or something as I recall.
However, Patch. That's why that all happened. That's why Wolverine #1 and onward for years didn't even fuckin feature Wolverine. They featured Patch. Wolverine was so insanely popular at the time, their own same damn company couldn't even do it. They just own portions of the deal like the name Wolverine for the comic etc. It took a few years for them to square it all away and reach an agreement with all of the creators.
WHERE IS THE FORK ON LOCKJAW'S HEAD? LICENSING.
Ms.Marvel got turned into a female Thing.
Yup, Sharon. Very oof
They got married a few years back yes
The same way you and I do, anon
He can have sex, somehow, without harming Alicia. Presumably he lies still and she rides him, any configuration where he moves into her couldn't possibly be safe.
Also the Thing is probably smaller than you think, Jack Kirby always drew him being around the same height as Reed, just a lot girthier. He's still literally as hard as a rock, but the surface could be pretty smooth where needed.
I never liked Hulk because The Thing exists. He is a chill and likeable guy who is strong, but not le hecking invincible.
I also liked Grey Hulk from the cartoon because he is like Hulk but based.
So this guys power is that he's a virgin, he can't have sex, can't even master bate, he is made out of rocks so he can't be killed UT that's all ????
He's not a virgin, ben grimm was a college quarterback.
Imagine going to the doctor to have your crusty rock cock sanded down.