QRD on what went down in the frigid winter of '22?

QRD on what went down in the frigid winter of '22?

buttraping with babish

Cavitating Chefs, Anon Babble! It appears that a famed "hole in the wall" has had his celebrity chocolate plundered by backdoor bandits after appetizing anteriors!

We'd best do to keep our own holes under firm lock and key...lest the same happen to us

BWAB?
BWAR?

get big on youtube

buy brooklyn studio

marry gold digger

hire an army of production staff

youtube numbers start going down

bad financial decisions start biting back

get idea

check self into mental hospital

hey doc i'm feelin kinda depressed think you got any special meds for me teehee wink wink ;^>?

nurse lock this retard up with the rapist

n-no wait! s-stop!

gets raped

gets divorced

still bald

I thought he lost his mind because of le heckin lockdowns and overwork.
It still baffles me that someone can get burnt out from work when you are the one deciding your own schedule.

what makes her a gold digger?

Except there's no police report or any kind of proof other than Babs saying trust me bro. It may have been a consensual encounter he regretted afterwards and rationalized as being an assault because he's deeply ashasmed of his latent homosexuality. He was probably pretty doped up too which can make you do things you wouldn't do if you were not on drugs.

lockdowns

To be fair I'd have lost my mind and gotten raped by a schizo too if I had to deal with the New York version of lockdowns

He was probably pretty doped up too which can make you do things you wouldn't do if you were not on drugs.

IT'S A JOKE

Babish enters the nastiest state ran asylum his wife dumped him at - can't spend any money on private when she has a shopping month at Milan and Paris coming up. Such a strong independent queen.

Dr. Greenblatt approaches

"Oh my science, I’m just so heckin depressed and anxious that I’m literally going insane. SAVE ME SCIENCE MAN!!"

Greenblatt gives Babish a look of mingled revulsion and confusion and beckons the orderlies Santos and Ferros the come over

"Oh bless you science, heckin valid POC bodies and talents to take care of me!!" Babish exclaims. Santos and Ferros give him the stink eye

Babish is wheeled at break neck speed in a stray jacket and wheelchair to the only available room

"Oh science, this is just like my heckin movies! This is just like one flew over the cuckoo's nest! Oh, valid POCs, I know this is just for show but science bless you!!!"

They dump him into a dingy damp room and lock the door. As Babish comes to his senses he notices Crazy Carl and Big Buck standing over him; his new roommates

"Ayoo, this lil bitch seems mighty fiiiiine to me. Shieeeeet" says Big Buck. Crazy Carl begins cackling like the madman he is and always will be.

"Oh, hello fellow cis white man and valid BIPOC. It’s ok for men to cry and show their emotions and go to therapy so I needed to check myself into a here to NORMALIZE THERAPY TO THE CHUDS and-- oh god wait what are these poor oppressed mentally ill individuals doing to me --NOOOOOOOOOO STOP GAPING ME NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DONT STICK YOUR PENIS INSIDE OF MY ASSHOLE AND HUMP ME AGAINST MY WILL UNTIL YOU CUM INSIDE MY ANUS I JUST WANTED ANTI DEPRESSANTS AND THERAPY AND SYMPATHY FOR ATTENTION NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

he didnt say that

Oi' got roiped'.

Why is his head so shiny

Wasn't he incredibly vague about the alleged assault?

he lost his mind because of le heckin lockdowns and overwork.

He lost his mind because he was abusing ritalin. when you're jacked up on meth "having a manic episode" is more or less par for the course.

He probably just got his dick grabbed or his ass slapped by some fag. Sexual assault could be basically anything.

guys guys guys, let's ask the important questions here. are the rumors true?

I swear his "attacked and sexually assaulted" was either

guy trying to intimidate him by talking too close to his face/nuttap

regular old strip/cavity search by orderlies because he was suspected of smuggling drugs in because he was doing meth, see

According to the post, he was gangraped by two black guys high on drugs so hard that they ruptured his asshole so whenever he goes to poop his asshole splits in half and bleeds out

and-- oh god wait what are these poor oppressed mentally ill individuals doing to me --NOOOOOOOOOO STOP GAPING ME NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DONT STICK YOUR PENIS INSIDE OF MY ASSHOLE AND HUMP ME AGAINST MY WILL UNTIL YOU CUM INSIDE MY ANUS

I have a hard time believing a straight man would write this shit even as a joke

Reminder that Babish has a video on his channel where he's cooking for Jill Biden at the white house. He clearly got involved with some shady DC elites, and quite possibly attended their sex parties.

he didnt saying that

Did his wife really divorce him after he got raped

His beard oil migrated to his scalp

Did he check himself into a hood hospital in the Bronx or something what the fuck was he expecting from those places

Or he did something embarrassing like swapping a handjob or a blowie with a crazy guy and then freaked out and realized his reputation as very wholesome guy could be damaged if the other person spoke out first. I don't know though because the whole thing is so vague. Maybe it's something as trivial as a crazy dude was peter gazing when Bab was pissing. Who knows?

Yeah but he was the one getting raped

he wanted the authentic urban experience

Blud went to the George Floyd hospital

>gets raped

HUHHHHHH, how tf do you get raped as a guy

I wonder what will babish said if that pasta made its way to his subreddit or social media dm

pasta

Trannete al pesto?

had a few negronis if you know what I mean

Raping with Babish

Go to a local asylum tonight. Get the creampie. Suck a guy off at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Get raped somewhere you’ve never been. Get raped by someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Take a negro. Take two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person raping you, but let them gape you anyways. Get fisted slowly. Tip your rapist. Check yourself in. Enjoy the ride.

Take a negro. Take two.

always gets a grin out of me

going bald is a greater injustice than getting raped
I hate being bald

First time I heard about it my mund immediately went to

3am

feels the sheet move off of him

wakes up and sees a 6'7" etaubatsu-class low-functioning autist inexpertly fondling his dick as he says entirely too loudly

"BABISH WHATS YO—WHATS YOUR FAVO-WIT FWASIUH EPISODE? I LIKE DE WON WHER HE FOUN OUT HE WUS NAMED - WHERE HE WAS NAMED AFTUH A MAUSE"