Is Defense Against The Dark Arts actually cursed or does it just attract the types of people who go "in order to hunt monsters you gotta think like a monster!" Or something?
Is Defense Against The Dark Arts actually cursed or does it just attract the types of people who go "in order to...
someone once said the job is literally cursed
Pick the stupidest explanation and you're probably right.
Voldemort literally cursed it when he wasnt given the job
If you consider Pottermore canon then yes, Voldemort got triggered when Dumbledork turned him down
here kids your new teacher against dark arts: Lupin Romulus werewolfus
What was Dumbledore thinking?
DADA is literally cursed
How do you even curse a whole subject?
no one can keep the job more than a year, it's a real curse
I'm more impressed by the fact that Snape, Dumbledore's most loyal agent, was suspecting Quirrel, yet both did fucking nothing and let him fuck around the school until Harry Ron and Hermione put the bullet in him, while being in grave danger.
No, it's literally cursed. Voldy has had his job interview in the 50s and nobody has held the job for longer than a year. It's pretty clearly literally cursed.
There is a fan theory that the diadem horcrux was powering it. It's sentient enough to plan someone's demise I suppose. It also has its own magic to draw from. Kind of pathetic to sacrifice a piece of your soul out of pettiness, but it wouldn't be that out of character for Tommy.
It's actually cursed
Couldn't they just rename the job position and call it the 'alternative magic classes' or something but teach dark arts defense spells?
Just give the job to Binns.
And then create a new dueling & dark creatures class.
It gets worse with the introduction of the veritaserum in Goblet of Fire. With that worldbuilding addition, that means that Snape was having to cast counter charms and shit to save Harry's ass, but apparently didn't think using a truth potion on the number one suspect was worth his time.
actually cursed
Yes. In the half blood prince book Dumbledore shows harry a memory of when tom riddle/voldemort showed up at hogwarts asking for the job.
Dumbledore suspects he came to the school to get something, and the job was just a pretext, then he tells harry he probably cursed the position because they've never been able to keep a teacher for more than a year.
Partly because he's a petty bitch mad he was told no, and partly to make sure the kids growing up would be poorly trained in the defense against the dark arts making it easier for his crew of retards to take over.
If you take book 1 at face value then the only explanation is that Dumbledore pitted Harry and Voldemort against each other on purpose, in the hopes that they destroy each other according to the prophecy.
The more likely explanation is that Rowling's first books were silly detective stories for children where grown-ups are all incompetent for comedic purposes. And that original style clashes really hard with the later books, which are aimed at young adults.
Fudge talked about "hit wizards" going after Sirius in the third book. He was clearly talking about Aurors but it's obvious Rowling didn't quite have the world figured out Pre-GOF
So was Voldy cursing the DATDA job when he reached into his pocket for his wand or was he gonna off Dumbledore?
How is David Thewlis so kino?
Nah he was gonna blast the old fool. He placed the curse together with the diadem.
I can not excuse book 4 at all, the only explanation for anything happening is all the characters becoming braindead
I mean wizards are genuinely pretty retarded and don't make a lot of sense.
Like they make a big point that hogsmead is the only all wizard community in england and everyone else is laying low (except when they're not) next door to muggles, but half bloods and muggle born are all over the fucking place.
Why is arthur weasly baffled by rubber ducks and electrical plugs when he could just lean over to some guy at work and go "Hey Mike, you're parents are muggles... what do you do with plugs?"
A lot of wizards basically still live in the middle ages, thanks J.K for explaining how they shit in manure holes and cover it up with magic.
Pottermore says it's literally cursed, but afaik the main movies / books just imply that all the applicants who are actually capable of teaching the class properly are unhinged in some way or another, even if they're decent at hiding it like Lockhart was.
I personally like to imagine all the major superpowers of the world are actually aware of wizards, not in like the "Minister of Magic meets the Prime Minister and tells him it's reaaaal" sort of way, more like the "Hellboy" sort of way where the CIA or something knows there's such things as elves and wizards and shit but tries to keep it off the books.
Curses the position so that people holding it get fucked up within the year
Takes the position himself in the first book
Get fucked over within the year
Was Voldemort fucking retarded? Also, how did Snape hold the position for longer than a year?
Also, how did Snape hold the position for longer than a year?
He didn't. He finally gets the job in Deathly Hallows, kills Dumbledore at the end of the year, and then Voldemort makes Snape headmaster of Hogwarts the next year school year.
So Snape only held the job for a year before losing it.
Idk why but Trelawney seems like the type of teacher who'd sleep with some of the students
He let Quirrel do the teaching so the curse wouldn't be broken. He did not really intend to stick around for longer than a year anyway since he just wanted to steal the stone and maybe kill Potter as a bonus.
They literally give animals human punishments like they tried with the Hippogriff, wizards are just kind of backwatds
I was wondering the same thing
Endless imagination of cool spells
only see a glimpse of it with Dumbledore vs Voldemort
end up getting the same 3 faggy spells thats just different colored flashes that even manage to hit adult wizards.
expeliarmus!
fucking gay and retarded
According to the books part of the curse is that it would always be called Defense Against The Dark Arts even if they tried to rename it
Fucking copout
It's one of the reason the Yates movies suck. He turned wizard battles into gun fights when they were much more fun and inventive in the books.
I also hate how later directors decided to do away with all the color and make everything increasingly more gritty, that shit made everything less interesting. They were better when you'd have roald dahl esque juxtaposition where kids are getting killed or eaten and everyone is still wearing bright medieval wizard robes.
FREE HIM
do away with all the color and make everything increasingly more gritty
isn't that a general problem with visual media starting from the mid 2000s, becoming more present and dominant as the years went on?
always thinking about how the EA game overstrike got turned into grey slop because they wanted to pander to the cowadoody audience
youtube.com
only now it seems like capeshit and fantasy genres are slowly making a comeback to colors and beauty.
or does it just attract the types of people who go "in order to hunt monsters you gotta think like a monster!" Or something?
Given how many of the details in the rest of the series adheres to deep rooted archetypes I'd guess that's the intent.
This series makes me wonder about other aspects of wizard life. Like for example, i wouldnt put it past for a situation where a wizard is frienda with a celebrity hairstylist and uses him or her as a supplier of celebrity hair to power the wizard's polyjuice brothel.
Imagine her riding you like hell and then suddenly, while orgasming, she starts shouting some prophecies in an alternated voice. Shit would be uncanny.
Wizards don't care or know about muggle celebrities I suppose.
Takes like an entire book and the death of Dumbledore to find one fake horcrux
Next book they just trip over horocruxes every other page
If you consider Pottermore canon then yes, Voldemort got triggered when Dumbledork turned him down
Pretty sure him trying to get the job, getting rejected, the the position getting cursed was stated in the books because I was aware of it before Pottermore was a thing.
Knowledge is power and Harry accumulates knowledge over the series so that by the end he's able to act adeptly
Defense Against The Dark Arts isn't real and it is or isn't whatever it has to be for the narrative.
Please suspend your autism.
What was Dumbledore thinking?
he'll be a great teacher for 29 days out of the month
the other one... uhh lets just figure out some way for hagrid to stick him in a cage or something
he said calmly
Need super duper magical items to destroy horcruxes
Except the headband or something, that one just kinda burned away or got crushed by a rock
bro do you think he's teaching night classes or something, why would it affect his teaching at all
That too
I mean it might be a problem if he transforms and then makes his way into one of the dorms while the students are all sleeping.
yeah they should probably go to a magic school or something to figure out a way to contain him
I can't watch any of them past Goblet of Fire. Even that one borders on being too dark and gay. Nothing tops the first 2.