Thunderbolts

Righteousness without power is just an opinion

Elaine spitting facts

Her "power" doesn't give a shit about her opinion
Kino

Amanda Waller and Suicide Squad from Wish.

He's called The Sentry, Jerry

The Sentry? Really! I don't know. What does he look out for? Is he patrolling? Sounds like he should be patrolling

He's not patrolling Jerry

I think he should be patrolling

elaine takes a fat shit on the nig nog from suicide squad

Elaine should be spitting on muh dick

sentries are stationary idiot

is the movie good?

Elaine get Sentry

Literally

Surprisingly good

Nope, not watching the capeshit

It's like Dr Strange, an actual good movie, not just a marvel movie

Yes, actually. Action is decent, group dynamic between the characters is good, there's some well done dramatic scenes. Sentry is literally me

Everyone but the most anti-capeshit people are praising as a surprisingly good movie and a step in the right direction for the MCU

Better than expected. Character dynamics and plot are nice, but the writers had three jokes that they really loved and they beat those horses into glue.

anything without the power to be enforced is just an opinion.

kek

incel does a school shooting

is given government mandated girlfriend and friend group

this fixes everything

KINO

I like it more than Guardians of the Galaxy.

the point isn't to talk about points it's to do things

- Karl Marks

(hadn't thought about it like this before)

They are spoiling their own movie after one weekend

What's the deal with her dad? He was killed by a mobster?

mommy Elaine

Its a good film actually. I dont know where the hate from it comes from.

Amanda Waller

what if Batman was a proud woman of color

Yes.

"Why would a God take orders from anyone at all?"

"You said I'm stronger than all the Avengers, and I'm pretty sure they have at least 1 God"

kino

It is way better than Guardians. Every one of them. Combined. And I liked the first two Guardians a lot.

I just died of cringe.

By a Dingo

I would have just preferred to watch a Seinfeld episode set in the MCU

Kramer get superpower
George date Captain Marvel
Jerry get ipad

its fine but they the anti john walker agenda is almost comical.

cape shit

Good thing you worthless faggots will never reproduce

Elaine ripped off Bucky's toupee and threw it out a window

What was her problem?

I'M GONNA GAPE

*points respectfully upward*

As a thunderbolts movie no. The team is fucking forced and unfunny. If it was just Black Widow 2 with bucky and sentry would have been good, the final showdown power of friendship was cringe it should have been about yelena and bob only

That'll do, Pugh

George gets superpowers but he spends the whole episode not knowing what it is

Devilishly Jewish Seymour.

Why even put Taskmaster in the movie?
She died in literally less than 60 seconds of screen time

Same reason as the suicide squad movie having jobbers, you need a costumes person to die to raise the stakes
In Thunderbolts it establishes their credibility as skilled assassins

It had nice individual pieces (Yelena and Sentry sparkling with chemistry, USAgent backstory, Red Guardian energy, Bucky being cool), but these pieces are glued in a typical Marvel way that makes it barely distinguishing from other MCU slop.
It's 7/10 movie.

I think you mean a dago

Capeshit fatigue is a real thing. I've got it bad but liked Sentry so bothered to check this one out. Naturally here the vemon spit is a bit harsher but look at where we are c'mon now. Oh I also thought maybe comic thunderbolts fans are upset too cause I guess this movie has Jack shit to do with the comics.

is she playing Tulsi Gabbard

Batman is nothing like Waller. She has no problem murdering people.

AKA shit leftists will never understand

Yes, but less hot.

After being dragged to see this on a work "TEAM BUILDING" night... it was kinda charming.
Too much banter / quipping but it was harmless

How drunk is Pugh in this?

Olga is there

Lol

In waht fuckign industry do you work that this counts as team building?

it’s basically like Andor and Deadpool in the sense that Disney let them do whatever with Thunderbolts and they were able to make a more mature movie with real feelings and a more realistic approach to the superhero business.

and there being no real villain, they were able to focus on the characters and how they coped with being the B-team and each having personal depression issues varying from being lonely to coping with drugs and hurting themselves, but realized as they worked together that they can rely on each other to stay afloat even if they still have that darkness inside them.

also FloPu/Yelena is my favorite

About 3.50

Atheist in 2025 doesn't understand basic Christian teachings about God or fundamental ethical concepts like righteousness

I am shocked.

The Bible was written by a bunch desert hobos. I don't think anybody fully understands God yet.

what if God came back to Earth and decided to hide amongst us again, but found Anon Babble and became a Anon

Another one

You're the new Captain America?

Yeah? Why? What's funny about that?

You're an asshole

God damn what I wouldnt give to be smothered by Pughs rolls

i like how everyone just puts up with him even though he does act like an ass

Yes

Hot take: I liked Taskmaster's fight scenes in this movie and not enough people comment on it. The shield blocking scene is great.

That's what I said

How does sitting in the dark silent for two hours count as team building

my boss is an idiot, what can I say

I WAS ON METH

She is Russian,so,she can drink votka with him and make him some borscht. A perfect girlfriend for Bob.

So this movie worth a 8 buck theater ticket?
Lucky motherfucker

Can she make a chebureki/pirozhki?

yes, especially Imax. it looks really good

Did you get free snacks?

The downside is she has the most annoying father in the world.

Is Yelena the only Avenger that has a healthy relationship with her father now?

He time-traveled me, Jerry

There's literally a scene in the movie where she walks into a Void room with a flashback of her being blackout drunk next to the bathtub, and Void Yelena shoves the vodka bottle into her mouth. Like something out of Smile.

They've had some great character development together. I just wonder where his wife went. Maybe she didn't want to live in a limo driver's apartment.

I like how there seems to be a hierarchy when it comes to the men they make fun of
Before red guardian arrives, everyone is shitting on John for being a loser cap ripoff, but after he arrives suddenly John "knows what he's doing" and is used to make fun of red guardian

The actor for Sentry was so fucking good in this

The 8 buck theater doesn't have imax
How annoying we talking about?

are they fucking stupid?
thor is just an alien, or they actually believe he comes from heaven or some shit?

Thor is from Norse Mythology.
Norse mythology considers Thor a god.

hope this helps!

Illegal alien.

Thor has introduced himself as the God of Thunder for as long as I can remember.

Realistically, there would be a HUGE religion towards Thanos.
And we're talking about something deeply ingrained in human nature, that would last for millennia.

Damn... how does Marvel keep creating these iconic quotes?

How annoying we talking about?

Has an ego the size of Russia, never shuts up, and watches 20 year old videos of himself.

Is she Tulsi?

Sounds less annoying than my own step dad

This. Elaine is better than Waller because she's not some big sweaty gorilla and also the Marvel character gets bonus points because she's Elaine.

Plot: A
Dialogue: A
Cast: B
Cinematography: C
Overall I thought it was good for a movie and great for a Marvel movie

We're taking you in, Val

I don't think so, Junior Varsity Captain America

K E K
E
K

Wtf is Walker's problem?

For the record my Arizona AMC has the photo as New Avengers and the title as Thunderbolts*. They are definitely trying to meme here but hasn't gone all the way yet.

I hate how they treat walker, they want to worship captain falcon so badly

Dat Ghost though

there was a deecee movie that did something similar ages ago?
they failed as usual of course, unlike Marvel.

Thank you, billionaire heiress

Are they really the new avengers though? In the post credit its treated like a joke and nobody takes them seriously. Also did they just forget about the hulk, antman, thor and war machine?

Almost tweaking holding himself from shooting her

lol

define innocent

They are the new avengers until sam wilson gets off his ass and makes a team.

Apparently the director had a whole act for tasky & didn't know they insta killed her off until he watched the premiere

the limp wristed soi version of the 'What the fuck did you just say to me you little bitch?' gorilla warfare chad

He fucked up once, lost his decorated career and best friend, and now everyone reminds him of it constantly.

I think the "killed an innocent man" thing is just how the media in MCU spun the story.

i just watched and its actually good, i dont feel like i wasted money and enjoyed

Yelena should have killed this bitch

tfw no Tulsi mommy gf to femdom you for not wanting to kill muslims

Righteousness is moral certitude, right? Not just an opinion. Sounds like villain talk.

Actually we’re still in DC

Baltimore is one block over

PLEASE COME WATCH OUR MOVIE GOY SO WE CAN MAKE MORE MONEY TO USE ON ADENOCHROME AND ORGIES

walker is a hundred times more interesting than falcon, hell maybe even more interesting that og cap

This sounds more like Bendis dialogue than something from Seinfeld.

Bitch tried to kill him.
Wasn't the guy Walker killed a terrorist that killed his bro?

So the new avengers are 3 less likable captain Americas + 2 other random nobodies?

Sorry, + a fat pig.

Based film

Iirc early script he fucks up by going full midlife crisis and pushing her away.

Walker will take Ava and Yelena's virginites.

Bob can watch from the corner.

US Agent is pretty damn likable.

Captain America x2

Bucky

Emotional Black Widow

Worst Invisible Woman

Bruce Banner Superman

I like them. Better than Sam's shitty team.

No I think the pseud film school kiddie is definitely (as always) in the wrong here

Sam has a Team? Who's in it?

Captain Nigga

Mexican Falcon

Warmachine

Ant-Man

Hulk

Spidey

I guess. Maybe Captain Marvel too?

Shang Chi and Professor Hulk seems more possible than Spidey, as the Shang Chi movie ended with Falcon, Brie Larson and Hulk Ruffalo talking.

Wasn't the guy Walker killed a terrorist that killed his bro?

Yeah but the majority of rando civilians don't know that.

Ah shit i didn't see Hulk already nvm, just Chang Shi

Your boss is a capeshit fag and found a way to watch his new sloppa on the company dime AND humiliate his wagies by forcing them to watch it too.

So no news station covered why a former Captain America killed some guy?

Just came back from watching this. I think the movie was very good, but why the fuck did Marvel decide to focus the marketing on spoiling the third act?

I'm assuming they panicked by how average to low pre-sales were, so they showed the more exciting stuff to get asses on the seat.

Could've at least hidden The Void though. With how much he was featured, I thought he would appear during the second act

This movie had far more personal stakes compared to the marketing it had

but why the fuck did Marvel decide to focus the marketing on spoiling the third act?

Why are you describing every single movie trailer in the last 25 years?

they want to worship captain falcon so badly

the end credits scene is literally about how he's a jealous faggot trying to patent troll them for "stealing" the Avengers branding

Isn't, it's getting shilled so hard after BNW bombed and cause they need people to like the new FF4

Threadly reminder this is one of the worst casting choices in movie history.

still better than Steven Yeun as Sentry.

I want Sentry to fuck my gf, and by that i'm also saying i want a Florence Pugh gf desu

Steven Yeun was supposed to be Sentry?

Thunderbolts and Fantastic 4 are two separate movies.

Cuck