Jurassic World: Rebirth

First look at the Distortus Rex.

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QUAID, OPEN YOUR MIND

Looks like their going full Dino Crisis 3

When Kanye West says "Nigga Heil Hitler" he's doing it in response to shit like that. The very concept of shit like that demands just a complete use of a sort of Skyrim style words of power dragon shout that just shocks the people putting that crap out there in the world. Nigga Heil Hitler both identifies the problem and harms it simultaneously. There's no negotiating with that utter mockery of quality, don't even entertain it. Just follow your instinct which compels you to shout Nigga Heil Hitler at it and walk away.

WHITE
WHALE
HOLY
GRAIL

This was supposed to be intimidating/scary? It's ugly and goofy.

Distortus Rex

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Americans see shit like this and say "Hell yeah"

Disastrous Rex more like what the fuck is this movie

EXTRA CHROMOSOME DINO DAMAGE!!!!

HELLO MY BABY

HELLO MY HONEY

*writes on clipboard*

Mhm, we made this one wrong...as a joke.

where are the feathers?

Why even call it Jurassic, this is a creature feature. The same universe as Cloverfield

Combine dinosaur DNA with frog DNA

End result is a monster with gorilla arms

?????

The cat is traumalized

Draw a squig..

Call it a dinosaur..

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we are reaching Cronenberg levels of dinosaurs here

I kinda wish that since they are opening the door to insane genetic mutation creatures they went even crazier with it. Kinda mundane given what was possible by imbuing it with different animal traits. Could have made a giant bioluminescent eel with a t-rex head that snaked around on land or some other wild shit. Instead we have this nigga

Wow! Is this a new chestburster design for Alien: Earth?

so stupid I lost all interest in the film
not watching it at all, hollywood needs to be punished

lol

Cause the book that movie is based on heavily deals with the DNA aspect of the dinosaur park.

It looks a little like a fetus, which terrifies the female audience they're aiming for

Because they don't actually find there to be anything interesting or wondrous about dinosaurs. To them their sole purpose is to be scary monsters, so there's nothing to do but make them more and more monstrous.

He seems like a real dickhead.

Distortus Rex

this shit is like EU sith names

It's better than the leaked first draft of the movie where the villain was a t-rex clone made using "evil DNA" called "Diabolicus Rex" and our heroes would be helped by a good dinosaur who's got righteous DNA called "Angelicus Rex", whose job in the island is to protect weak dinosaurs from Diabolicus.

That actually sounds way cooler than down syndrome rex

The movies barely resemble the books at all anymore.

Just scrap the stupid DNA shit and give us cool dinosaurs that actually existed like Utahraptor and Megalodon

whoa no way we can't do that
real dinosaurs are gay and have feathers now. We need cool fictional dinosaurs that look like this guy

pictured: a cool dinosaur

My dream JP movie is a rip off of alien with one velociraptor loose on a cargo ship. The franchise is so far away from its start as a horror movie. It needs a low stakes plot where the worst thing that can happen is a guy gets mauled. No more of this eco-terrorist james bond shit.

people keep talking about the new movies like they're good

okay got one of them pop up on amazon let's take a look

movie starts with voiceover

"now that dinosaurs have been spread all over the planet, a group of rogue hackers are trying to steal the cure for cancer based on dino dna from evil corporations"

the fuck is going on with this franchise?!?

the fuck is going on with this franchise?!?

An attempted appeal to the ching chong film market

barely resemble the books at all anymore

they never did in the first place, the first one is the closest but that's mostly due to keeping the setting and most of the names
the movie ends at the start of the book's third arc and none of the characters act anything like they do in the book
the film jurassic park is almost entirely a spielberg creation, crichton just laid some of the basic groundwork for it

crichton just laid some of the basic groundwork for it

He's listed as a writer on the screenplay so I dont think that's true

I remember reading the first two books ages ago and iirc both of them were revolving around a group of people that had to survive being stranded in an environment where dinos roam around.

I don't see how this can be stretched in the movies past the logical limit of such a contrivance.

nta but only like small vestigal things so it's not like they actually matter beyond retarded redditors blowing them way out of scale from reality

"raptors" were all probably fully feathered

eh meybe but that's only a subset opf dinos and the reddit faggots I bitch about are actig like everything is like that

Deviljho will be in a jurassic world sequel any day now.

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i came here to post this

fucking kek

Retardus Rekt

IF DAT IZ SQUID, WHY IZ IT NOT PROPPAH RED?

"guys we did like ten dinosaurs now, what's next?"

Uhhhhhhhhh monsters...!?

Stupid dinosaur is gonna put me in debt!

our star dinosaur... is a RETARD!!!

why

This can't be real

His name is Distortius and if you're not ready to step up and be a real man for me AND him then you can keep walking just like his fake daddy

mogolicus rex

That's just a Hunter that needs to hit the gym instead of neeting it up in the basement.

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2bq honest with U, I would not like to be chased by a giant chicken

is that a monster hunter game?

What are you guys so angry about? The new Brumak model looks great

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I sent them my script about a genetically enhanced raptor special forces team with human or maybe porpoise level intelligence outfitted with weapons and night vision called SEAL team 65 (a nod to 65 mya, the KT boundary), but they send me a letter back saying it was too stupid of an idea.

Diablolicious

give me 1 reason why a triceratops cant be the main villain. have you seen violent elephants?

Goddamn that bitch from The Last of Us is in this too?

A HUMAN REPRODUCTIVE SYSTEM

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Looks like a retard rex.
I'd done with Jurassic park, i'm going to watch that Vietnam with dinosaurs movie that's coming out instead.

The book actually ends with Grant realizing the dinos are actually behaviourally similar to real dinosaurs when they track down the raptor's nest in the tunnels, because the focus of his current research was velociraptor childcare & nesting and he wants to see if they actually reared their young like baby birds. When they discover the dino nest it vindicates his theory that they cared for their young

because it's a herbivore?
People aren't afraid of herbivores, it's basic human psychology you can't fight it. Herbivores actually kill way more people each year around the world than carnivores do, but it's the sort of thing people are going to be afraid of.

Wasn't Malcolm a minor character who gets injured and died of infection/poison before they could evacuate? It's been decades since I read the book, but seemed like he was a minor character they decided to blow up in the movie.