When was the last time you acted like this scene?

When was the last time you acted like this scene?

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be me

3am

wife wants to stop doing coke and says we should go to bed

NO

snort a hollywood rail

pull her pants down

shove my tongue deep in her ass

people keep telling me to keep drinking even though i have a clear drinking problem

son, move out and get married

"No."

chik...chik b'gah...

You stupid asshole for making me laugh.

Contribute to society!

when my doctor told to stop drinking or i would have liver failure soon

why are coke stories always some ridiculous shit?

I had this housemate try and stiff me on the rent. We paid rent monthly and he tried to stiff me on his portion by only paying half since he moved out two weeks into the month. However I was the fucking chessmaster since I had control of the bond for whatever reason. So he got his bond back minus the two weeks he tried to stiff me on. When he asked in a whiny tone for me to give him the whole thing I was like NO. I'm the chessmaster bitch. Anyway we stopped being friends because of it which sucks. I still have his copy of Neuromancer somewhere

kek

One time my boss at a porn warehouse tried to bring in a stranger to be our supervisor and the guy, who was a sweethearted goober and kind of wormlike and malleable, just couldnt figure out simple storage/retrieval/tracking, and one day he asked me to do something totally mundane and my brain said "No." and I just left work and got a job setting up 401k's.

When you do coke you'll understand

Nothing about that is ridiculous

Because no one shares stories about the times they spent $80 to have the energy to do house chores

Someone at my job kept telling me to bring him things, I only brought him one thing and usually I don’t mind getting thing for people but he was giving off this vibe as like he was trying to be assertive when I came back and he was like “oh and can you get a water bottle too?” I was like “Sure!” And then I clocked out and left, probably didn’t piss him off of anything but I wonder how long he was there for

daughter asks to watch the new Snow White.

Hey bro! I just followed you on Strava like like three weeks ago. You gonna give me a follow back???

be me

play on a world of warcraft private server

Name my pet gorilla "GeorgeFloyd"

Woke troon plays a dungeon with me

Notices my pet name

Flips a shitfit and reports me to GMs

Pet gets force renamed

Abandon renamed pet and have fake memorial service and get other people to say "RIP GeorgeFloyd, he was a good boy"

Woke tranny completely crashes out calls me a Nazi and a racist and demands I be kicked from the guild or else he quits and puts a hard deadline and proceeds to count down

Spams guild chat with angry bullshit and ultimatums

He demands I quit on my own if officers won't kick me

I post OP image.

Get to deadline

he quits, nobody cares.

Go get new Gorilla, name it DinduNUFFIN

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RIP GeorgeFloyd, he was a good boy

When my mom told me to put my underwear in the laundry hamper instead of on the floor

I acted like the CHARACTER. I've never acted "like a scene".

Fucking retard.

be me

Wait, so you're telling a story in the first person about YOU?? No way!! Thanks for clarifying.
Usually people tell stories but don't specify that they happened to them. Good job!!!!!!

when my mom asked me to get a gf

literally an hour ago. 10 mins before my shift finished and my boss asked me to do something pointless that I knew for a fact takes longer than 10 minutes
just said I gotta piss and walked off lmao
God I want to be fired so bad

This one time a millennia old elf lord asked me to throw an incredibly powerful magic ring into the volcano it was forged in right after cutting it off from the dark lord's hand after a long, bloody war

No.

For some reason it's always hilarious to me that he looks just like aphex twin.

licking fecal matter

Epic cool brochacho

about 10 years ago when I last went to the dentist and they told me I really should brush at least once a day

about 7 hours ago when my brother asked me if i wanted something from mcdonalds

When mother told be to stop grabbing her tits.

RIP GeorgeFloyd, he was a good boy

When I was offered a glass of wine some hours before and I said no because I don't handle alcohol very well

cope to deal with the fact that they will never be as cool as alcoholics

it's not far fetched for a coke story. the reason he likely used his tongue is because it gives you a micropenis after so many lines.

ol Georgie Floydie. e'll be sorely missed.

When was the last time you acted like this scene?

I don't flush.

Parents asking me to stop playing vidya and make something of myself

That's my reaction when everyone tells me to stop smoking

gross. no one wants to hear about your drugged up sex with your hedgehog of a wife

I'm an alkie so nobody complains about my smoking, just my drinking. checkmate sober fags

When people say stop being a incell

Promise me you'll pull out this time.

TRIVIA TIME
This was Hugo Weaving dubbing the "No" in that scene.

good story. It sure is weird how George Floyd was treated like Jesus for two or three years. Truly deranged. He was a violent criminal, a drug addict, and a porn star but he was treated like the prophet Mohammad .

you should watch this movie because it has this actress in it that makes my peepee hard

This happens too often on this board.

when a bunch of bought and paid for scientists told me to take an untested gene mod because it will stop killing sick people or something

Actually they used the soundbyte from when Viggo Mordorson kicked the bucket on set and shouted "No!" when he realized he also broke his leg in the process

You joke, but I'm serious.

he thinks having no alcohol is a "drinking problem"

I agree with the other anon that if you can just stop then you don't have a drinking problem lol