Meryl Streep to Voice Aslan in Greta Gerwig's THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA

Mocapped by Laura Dern, I hope!!!!!!!!

Oh my god, this is everything

when will this trend end.... i can't take it much longer, bros...

lol

Aslan, who will be female in the series.

I don't even like Narnia, but the moment I heard Gerwig was directing, I knew it would be woke garbage.
why are they so fucking predictable?
can't even have a fucking male LION to be the good guy anymore.

lmao

voice an asian

thats racist

more goddamned narnia?

more goddamned lotr?

but this is just another version of a book series we already have several versions of

oh fuck this is too good
I can feel we're close to the end days now

yes that is also trash, even worse in fact

Charli is going to be in it too, we are getting kino

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They continue to overestimate how many people are going to hate watch something because of purposely controversial decisions

I hope the entire cast is female. girl power!

I don't think they even care about the amount of people who watch stuff anymore, it doesn't really matter for subscription models anyway, it's just about the amount of chud bashing clickbait you can get in the media

What a powerful statement.

Good for Greta, putting her progressive vision ahead of box office profits. Brave.

Agree, there's nothing more visionary and empowering for people today than casting a 75 year old Hollywood mainstay as lion-god

Jesus is a woman now

So brave

narnia fucking sucks

It's all so tiresome...

Okay, but isn't Aslan Jesus? Like, not metaphorically, not allegorically, he is LITERALLY Jesus Christ. This is revealed at the end of the series. What's the idea behind making him a woman?

Never, we are simply in the document the decline phase now.

Why's it matter? Jesus and Aslan are both sexless. Gender is irrelevant to their character.

Jesus is not sexless though. He is a real person who physically existed, and was a male.

Scorsese made a film tackling this and Christians burned down movie theaters. They want androgynous asexual Jesus. Any assumption that Christ ever had uintentional erections or nocturnal emissions is blasphemy of the highest order.

She watched as Harvey devour the younger actresses

The devil wears prada is voicing Jesus

Don't believe I'll watch.

Jesus is consistently depicted as sexless and it's very controversial to suggest otherwise. You know Catholic priests and Shakers aren't allowed to have sex right? Where do you think that comes from?

It comes from St. Paul, you kike faggot. Repent from your blasphemy or you'll damn yourself.

Jesus is not depicted sexless. Jesus is a man and he resists temptation, he isn't an angel, angels are sexless.

the anti-White, anti-Male, anti-Christian corpo isn't going to be doing a proper adaptation of one of the single most recognizable Christian narratives written by a White Male

Shocker.

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Shan't be watching, in that case

Jesus craved pussy

Christians have killed people over less

What the fuck? Why

Utter blasphemy, piss off.

Female Lion?

There is only so much baby blood in the world anon. It must end soon.

Aslan with a female voice

Beyond retarded but this is the world we're living in.

Cumbrain can't imagine the idea of a religious man choosing chastity.

this isn't some netflix by commitee choice. Gerwig is a libtard auteur.

It ends when it becomes a death sentence to do it. If Christians actually took it seriously the worst case scenario would be another hays code, best case this bitch would already be burning

Another pointless woke reboot to the shitpile of pointless woke reboots nobody cares for, how many are there now? Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, X-Men...

?
Nothing there implies he doesn't choose chastity. Christians become extremely upset if you suggest he had testicles that produced sperm

Where did St. Paul get it from? Retard

So a Jewish atheist woman is voicing Jesus? Weird.

?????????????????

Weird

Weird-er than a black Snow White?

this isn’t some netflix by committee choice

it was that kind of committee that put some creepy jew in charge of this child’s lion movie
so is the lion a tranny or what? fuck this

christians get mad if you suggest jesus was asexual

christians get mad if you suggest jesus was heterosexual

What, was he gay?

directed by greta gerwig

I don’t think you’re an authority on Christians in any way. Jesus wasn’t “asexual” (mentally ill) or gay (mentally ill). He was just a normal man.

a yenta playing a jesus metaphor

April fools?

Obviously not, suggestion that he was a normal man is considered blasphemy

Kamala lost and men aren’t women. You can’t even lie about it on your passport and license anymore. It has to say what you are (male). Remember that.

So you're saying that Jesus Christ had nocturnal emissions?

Its almost like christians are multiple people

People have been saying God is a woman since the 90s. It's shocking and provocative if you were born 10 years after 9/11 or were born before 1960.

But if Jesus was a regular man he would be attracted to women, as Scorsese depicted in The Last Temptation. Christians committed arson over the film

What's your opinion? Androgynous or straight?

Daring today aren’t we

Jesus was fucking Mary Magdalene, everyone who is not a retard knows this.

I'm not a christian, your stupid post made me realize that fact though that christians are multiple people and thus would have a difference in belief on such subjects. I think there is something about Mary Magdalene though so I guess he is straight but once again I'm not a good source on this information.

Meryl Streep to Voice Aslan in Greta Gerwig's THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA

Sigh, its all so tiresome. Is there anything they won't infest with their nonsense?

This is going to be the most Jewish thing ever. It's going to bomb so bad. I'm not religious but Christians still do wield economic power but they rarely wield it but I could see this being not only failing but being a bad movie too because it doesn't have the ironic childless wine aunt Barbie vibe

When conservatives make their own movie industry

Kamala lost

You say that like it's a good thing

What a retarded quote

The irrelevant shit Republicans care about blows my mind. Just pure goysoldiers for the culture war

It is funny how the small handful of decent movies over the last 20 years have all involved clint eastwood

It makes sense for identification in case you are unresponsive, need medical attention, and actually "pass" (mostly ftm)

Are you suggesting people are genderless until they fuck? Jesus was male.

That little potato's making movies now? WTF

APRIL FOOLS DAY

Is this related to ellen page's trans lion documentary?

So will he- her - she - w/e still have a mane? lol.

Jesus was bot sexless. He was a very masculine figure and did manual labor for a living