"We're gonna draw a little bit of everyone's digits

"We're gonna draw a little bit of everyone's digits.
Posts from one of you Things can't resist getting dubs"

I'm just a regular guy

Not a thing...

Singles get

How long were you alone with that dog?

AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

TORCH HIM

Flamethrower, here!

fry 'em

hello

How'd you do, fellow humans?

I've always wondered what it would be like to fuck The Thing if it didn't assimilate me.

Hand me the flamethrower Mac, I'll cover you

I found OP's dirty undies

I'm just dropping by to say that if a movie has Kurt in it, I'm watching. No questions asked.
Now check 'em.

Could have been anyone planted those!
I'll show you what I get...

GET ME OUT OF THIS THREAD GET ME OUT

this is ridiculous

Clark fucked the dogThing. That's why they were best buds and it didn't assimilate him.

The Thing must have liked it.

It's not too late to make a Thing sequel if Russell can sign on. The Thing could be an old Macready hiding out in the wilderness somewhere. A team of researchers stumble across him then he starts doing Thing things

Look, I'm just saying that getting dubs does not necessarily means someone is the thing. That sounds mighty dubaphobic if you ask me.

I'm fine you don't even need to check me
serious

slices deeply into my thumb with a scalpal

Here's my digits

This is pure nonsense, doesn't prove a thing.

Bullshit. This thread doesn't prove anything

I swear I'm not one of those things!

28 replies

just one thing

That's it guys, we're in the clear.

Is being a Thing really that bad? Let's ask ourselves that

I agree, no need to look further. Now untie us OP.

Maybe we shouldn't

Eat this

I just wanna get drunk

I'd rather not spend the rest of this thread TIED TO THIS FUCKING COUCH!

keep an eye on anon. little too close to dog.

This is stupid now. There aren't anymore, just let us out of this thread.

How do you know this is legit? OP could be a The Thing himself, leading us astray with a phoney-baloney test for detecting The Things to lull us into a false sense of security so we stop looking. Hell for all we know half of these singlesposters could be the Things.

Stupid test. I want it understood that I'm doing this under duress.

This is true. I'll believe it. We should burn the OP instead.

good point, shall we discuss this together in another room?

Burn him

THIS, now let's just all go to sleep with our necks exposed

I'm not doing this

Sup niggas

*Inhuman screeching begins*

Im not the thing.

Legitimate question though, was childs a thing? I go back and forth on it. Mac im pretty sure isn't. Childs I used to be certain was the thing but now I think he might be human

I'll just guard the door over here...

We shouldn’t run this test. We should be able to trust eachother

Nah, people always debate on this. I always saw the ending as the two remaining survivors losing all their trust in each other.

There's a theory saying that Macready knows Childs is the thing at the end, because the bottle he drinks out of is filled with petrol not whiskey. Macready laughs because he just figured it out. It's also a callback to the beginning when he pours his drink on the chess wizard

Hey guys it's safe here! Quick, come in!

if I was the Thing, could I do this?

I'd legit drink all the fucking liquor there was

There is still cellular activity in these burned remains. They're not dead yet

ptfew, that was a close one!

Why don't we just wait here for a little while, see what happens...

performs autopsy on biological assimilating alien lifeform

doesn't even wear gloves

that looks kinda dangerous

It's no biggie...

The ending implied Childs was IMO. As said its a callback to the start of the movie. Mac was checkmated by the computer, so rather than let it win he pours whiskey on it to destroy it. The computer = the thing. The thing is present in Childs.

Why didn't he just start stabbing random people with a big knife?

that's not his jacket...

look, ive been range banned for two weeks and (You) want me to shitpost!

I'm pretty sure the thing is dead. Let's get out of here.

get him boys!

I was wrong! Kill it!

Maybe we're at war with Norway

Go back to where you come from

come on, open the doors already!

Worse than that.

Imagine being an Eldritch alien abomination. Crazy.

Me irl

I'm better now. I want to come back inside.

This video used to freak me out so much but now I think he's kind of cute :)

Definitely not the alien here

haha yeah
imagine

It's NOT me.

AW COME ON, MAC

WINDOWS BLAS- oh.

I felt bad for the Norris head thing. Why did the Palmer thing betray it?

How does a species like that even exist? Did it just consume all other life in its world?

Would I lie to you guys?

Enough is enough! We're turning on each other now!

I swear I'm not an alien guys
guys..?

What would sex with the Thing be like?

Nothing to see here…

What happens if you get trips?

It would be extremely painful.

You're a big fag.

UUUU

Its home planet is a massive competing orgy of flesh. Ever changing. Ever bored.

Now I'm just picturing an entire planet covered completely in undulating skin.

I know you jannies have been through a lot. But when you find the time, I'd rather not spend the rest of this summer STUCK WITH A FUCKING RANGEBAN!

Only way to lose is if a thing pops up and nobody torches it before bump limit.

YOU ASSHOLES ARE FUCKING PARANOID SCHIZOPHRENICS! YOU'RE KILLING PEOPLE FOR NO REASON! THERE IS NO THING AND THERE NEVER WAS!

Yes. I agree.

Surely I will be fine

I'm clean, Mack.

maybe we'll just warm things up a little around here

I'm NOT the Thing.

Devious, Thing. But no dice.

kill it

Not me boss

Why is the Thing so violent? How does a creature like that have a flying saucer?

That theory doesn't work though as mac is about to take a drink from the bottle before childs appears. Why would he drink gas?

Plus the thing is able to absorb memories. Couldn't it absorb taste and realize "that's not whiskey"

Yeah for repetition sake it makes sense. But why wouldn't he just stay out in the cold. Why walk up to find Mac? Why not just freeze and let mac freeze as well then wait for rescue team and thaw?

BITCH! BITCH!

If the beginning is supposed to mirror the dog, then in theory the thing took the form of some other species, took their ship to escape death, and tears to earth

not "banned remains"

singles GET

who

WE'RE BEING OVERRUN
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I don't believe the gas in the whiskey bottle idea, but Childs has to be a thing just for the symbolism. The whole movie is a strategic battle between Mac and the Thing, just like how we see Mac play chess against the computer. Doesn't make sense that the movie wouldn't end with Mac and the Thing as the final survivors. They probably both know that they're going to die together, but are stuck in a stalemate trying to think of a way to win.

Almost got away with it

You have to split up with someone from the group who are you going with? Hanging out in the shed with Blair seems like a safe bet.

Windows can't be trusted

I NEVER TRUSTED WILFORD BRIMLEY

YEAH? WELL, FUCK YOU, TOO.

Not with you thats for sure

Obviously I'd hang out with Mac, taking turns at Chess Wizard and complaining about its bullshit programming.

Why'd they always use flamethrowers? Wouldn't regular bullets kill the thing?

WINDOWS BLAST HIM!

Every individual cell was a living thing, retard. Why do you think a puddle of blood leaps away when touched with the hot wire?

I know I'm human.

Is that canon?

What about trips?

AAHHHHH

*does nothing*

SHHHIEEET!

*suspiciously lurks in a dark hallway*

Back! Get the Hell back! Now I didn’t come anywhere near those dubs. It was Copper!

It's amazing how they trained a dog to move in such an uncanny way, like it's unfamiliar with its own anatomy.
youtube.com/watch?v=JALsh_hxdMk

I'm a regular human man you can definitely trust me

I love the part where the Thing's worried expression just disappears after they test his blood. Like he's dropping all pretenses and goes straight to his "here we fucking go again..." game face.
Pure kino. Also posting a cutie.

Oink.

It's clobbering time!

YOUR NOT FOOLING ME SMARTASS