I want Leia to be princess on the beautiful planet of Alderaan

I want Leia to be princess on the beautiful planet of Alderaan

What about the boy?

Idk put him on shithole planet idc

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If Jimmy Smits wasn't there would Yoda have taken the girl to live with him on swampworld?

Why did they have to separate them anyway?

No one knew she was pregnant with twins until the birth so by separating them the Emperor could kill one and the other would be safely anonymous.

Luke ripped up her organs on the way out so it's fair

Turns out being a Force prodigy is heritable and the Jedi have been nerfing themselves to avoid superhero dynasties from forming. If Vader found one of them they'd be fucked but if Vader found both of them they'd be turbofucked.

If Vader found one of them they'd be fucked

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NGL I always thought the reason was Organa had to convince his wife, and she was kind of a bitch about it only only agreed to take the girl.

we need to hide this child where Vader would NEVER look

let's put him on Vader's home planet near his old house

Also that Kenobi knew that Luke's family kind of sucked and could be convinced to take a boy because he could help on the farm, but would see a girl as a useless mouth to feed.

You mean the planet he hated because of his past of slavery there and the brutal murder of his mom?

Yes

And name him Skywalker

With Anakin's only remaining relatives

still you'd think they'd at least take him to an UNKOWN planet. half of the history of the galaxy happens on Tattooine

Vader lived on Mustafar. Just hating a place ain't a reason for him not to go there if HIS FUCKING SON might be there.

Was pretty foolproof plan, as tatooine is covered in sand which as we all know Vader is not the biggest fan of.

Fast forward to 16 years from now:

Y....Yoda, why are there all these weird human/grogus running around?

Monster, I am not, but suck itself, it would not.

I despise this new disney lore. What's wrong with Vader's castle being on Vjun? Why do we need the already tiny galaxy being even smaller?

A high tech space society surprised by childbirth and twins.

lets have vader not have a castle instead. its fucking gay.

t. low functioning autist

Disney ruined SW. The prequels at least had soul and a original story. Disney is just REMEMBER THIS??

He would have found some distant relatives of Schmi and dumped her with them

Your problem, now she is

Blame Yoda. Obi-Wan was just following orders.

Why not? The dude was the Emperor's right hand man. He had a mile long super star destroyer why not a castle or two? Hell, I'd expect Vader would be gifted whole planets to rule over if he asked for it.

Even worse than “REMEMBER THIS?” It’s “Star Wars has ALWAYS been female and diverse, chuddies.”

Disney exists to sell slogans to girls. No wonder they are incapable of upholding the themes of the setting. The Jedi, the Force, and the plot of the saga are all entirely and exclusively masculine.

I can name maybe one or two girls in my life who like SW. However 90% of guys like it. God I hate Disney

Don’t forget:

it’s cool guys I’ll set up shop a few miles away and keep an eye on Luke

won’t Luke figure out who you are and start putting the pieces together?

no, I’ll change my name from Obi Wan Kenobi to Ben Kenobi, he’ll never suspect a thing

Why would he know who Obi-Wan is?

Luke Lars didn't have the same ring to it and Owen didn't want to share the name anyways. I blame that bitter old fuck.

Fuck off Lorelet. Tatooine was the planet Darth Vader was least likely to visit. He was obsessed with forgetting his identity was once Anakin Skywalker

It’s established he knows what the Clone Wars were and that his dad fought in them. I know libraries are scarce on Tatooine but there is a better than average chance he starts reading about the Republic generals who also fought in the war.

everyone knows the prequels are shit

Prequels, sequels, and everything involving Filoni is shit.

Originally, Leia wasn't supposed to be Luke's sister. This was retconed in Return of the Jedi.

I feel like you're all implying that all of this was ill conceived and poorly thought out.

doesn't bother me much. theres a lot of autists on Anon Babble who get their panties in a twist over star wars tho.

prevents incest

The dude was the Emperor's right hand man.

Yeah so when is he going to find the time to be "at home" on some planet anyway? It makes no sense. His home should be said star destroyer, a mobile base of operations from which he could do his job.

This is true. Also, Darth Vader wasn't Luke's father.

20 years goosestepping for sheev

never a day off

Anakin was a real good wage slave.

ANH marketing at the time pointed to a potential romance between Luke and Leia.

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What's he going to spend his time at home doing, jerking his dick which got burned off? Work is the best thing for him, keeps his mind off his problems.