10%? Blimey! That’s quite a lot, isn’t it?

10%? Blimey! That’s quite a lot, isn’t it?

Why do they sell mustard behind the counter in the UK?

I just go to different stores so it’s spaced out more often

THE FOOTBALL IS OFFICIALLY GOING ON FOREVER!

so the migrants can't kill each other with it

Back then, an apple, loaf of bread, and a newspaper cost almost the same as one of those beers

that's actually too little, just get some vodka

this, if you are true alkymaxxing you just start drinking straight spirits

It's an alcoholic pretending he isn't. Buying vodka would be 'admitting' he is an alky. So he just drinks a beer.

Actually true alkies don't drink the alchohol at all, they take it rectally. Far more efficient that way.

Yeah, drinking beer is retarded unless you’ve just done hard work or you’re eating asian food. Big mouthful of cheap vodka or rum and I’m good to go

Well Anon Babble, it's such a lovely day, I thought I might have a GLASS of beer

Guys what does it mean when I can literally drink hard liquor every single day and when I suddenly have to stop I don't get any withdrawal symptoms?

Is this the thread?

I'm sorry man.. but that means you have AIDS

eastern european/slavic genes?

You could blind a woman with that much vinegar. Acid attacks are common there.

It means you're an alcoholic. Literally the only reason I'm not an alcoholic is because I get awful hangovers and my brain associates alcohol with feeling like shit.

Before I stopped drinking alcohol I used to calculate the $ to standard drink ratio
Not that I really cared though because I always bought cask wine but I did it because I was just curious
I'd buy a 4 litre cask of wine and get through it in 2 weeks

It means you're an alcoholic.

started drinking beer for the first time in my life at the tender young age of 35 a few months ago

have tried like 17 different brands at this point

all taste the same

all taste ok, not great but not bad either, sorta like a sour seltzer water but much more expensive

all give me a headache if I drink more than 3 a night

can still go days without having one and don't crave it at all

got drunk exactly once and hated it, just felt like a confused sleepy retard who kept dropping things

I'm just not getting the appeal.

Damn bros, alcohol withdrawals are a bitch. I haven’t slept in 72 hours, the shakes are gone but I just can’t sleep even if I take a bunch of OTC sleeping pills, I just feel groggy but can’t drift off. The bugs crawling on my skin feeling has finally subsided tho. The first couple days I felt like I had mini seizures where I’d tense up and spasm. Fuck.

That's an alcoholic lager beer

every goddamn post

You were exactly where I was at. I tried drinking after not drinking for 72 hours and not sleeping at all amd then as soon as I took a sip my body started to experience excruciating pain and I had to get rushed to the hospital. 10 months sober now and it's fucking HORRIBL4

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I can literally drink hard liquor every single day and when I suddenly have to stop I don't get any withdrawal symptoms

You're probably not drinking enough each day to get withdrawal. Having three cheeky whiskeys a day isn't gonna give you shakes and bad insomnia.

Probably the same now if you get it from some paki cornershop

how much/often do you actually have to chug to become an alky?

Yeah it's fucking awful. Best not to stop drinking unless you have some Ambien/benzos/etc. gabapentin helps too.

This entire sketch plays in my head several times daily, laugh track and everything

always been weekend warrior, drinking max once/week

since pandemic been drinking every other day/every 3rd day

can feel the mental decline happening, make way more typos than i used to

feel like i talk like a retard when hungover

get random pangs of pain in liver area

yup, can't do it anymore. really sucks because i love drinking. maybe i'll try out weed again, or those microdosing shroom capsules

Just do heroin you faggot.

EH!?

It sounds like you are trying it out because you wanted a fun drug to get addicted too lmao

I almost pissed myself laughing at this lol

Coming up on the corner shop sketch:

I'm looking to buy a can of lager beer for my aunt.

how much sugar do you consume a day?

I don't want to get addicted and I don't like the idea of drugs in general, I'm just trying to see why like a 5th of the planet drinks it regularly. It's alright.

Probably 40g+.

i wouldn't mind trying it but with fent being in absolutely anything i don't think it's worth it. i'm lucky i'm still here given my coke phase

That's Numberwang

Well you've come to the right place, after all, a corner shop

kek

Oh, that's a bad miss

looking back on it, they had a lot of sketches about alcoholics

I knew an alcoholic who used to inject vodka. His nickname was Strawbs because his face was bright red. You can absorb alcohol through your eyes too, apparently

Excuse me what happened to that nice janny from the other week that cleaned up twitter garbage but let us have a little fun with shitposting?

He's gone. They're all gone. And we're back

Who's back?

The incredibly neurotic and overweight men who are still unaccountably janitors!

Two months sober because my new gf is on the wagon. I still hear the devil whispering in my ear every time I head to the shops.
Blacking out makes the weeks go by faster.

Mitchelle and Webb or Key and Peele? Who did sketch comedy better?

PETRIL

as a former alcoholic. cask wine is the best value

The last sketch of the entire show is really sad ;_;

You don't have the booze euphoria gene, be thankful.

Why would you want time to pass faster? Life is beautiful. Be thankful you have someone that loves you, you are more blessed than most.

I find it odd how little control the majority of people have over alcohol. Sometimes I can go out and decide I'm not drinking for the first hour if we're out early, secondly people get really stressed if there's not a pint in front of the the entire time, thirdly smart things like drinking water at the same time to mitigate hangovers are completely foreign. I am addicted to other things, but I don't know anybody with the level of alcohol control as I have, I don't really like drinking but I do it semi regularly. Once per month of average and then maybe a few days consecutively if on holidays.

based buttchugger

Mitchell and Webb, but Armstrong and Miller are better than them.

I can use opioids and quit opioids freely. I enjoy the euphoria but have no problems abstaining, even if I have easy access to them. I've been hooked on getting drunk ever since my first drop.

its mustard gas

they're both great but have to give the edge to key and peele because the mitchell and webb situation (sketch show they did before the more famous "look" one) blows ass

i sometimes wonder how much alcohol i'd drink if it was illegal and i had to get it like how i get coke: call up my sketchy dealer and wait outside for 20 minutes before actually getting it.